Every guy, specifically every comedian, knows that a woman's number is a whole lot of hooey. You say ten; he realizes you meant seventeen. And it's not that you're lying about "seven," it's just dudes consider any "crossing the threshold" to be sex.
While the whole "number" issue's been batted about more times than anyone could care to recount (Lisa and Marge Simpson once decided Lisa could wear white to her wedding because Milhouse "doesn't count"), the fact is the lion's share of guys don't count. But guys do care about sexual history for at least 5 reasons.
- Disease: Guy's without junk funk would prefer to keep it that way. While he doesn't want to ask, he's keenly interested in not catching anything that will make him itch, cause pee-related burning, disfigure his mouth, genitalia or anus, give him the cancer or compromise his immune system. If you're clean, he's cool.
- Famous people: There's a good chance he won't be jealous that you screwed the lead singer of Arctic Monkeys, but he will wonder if he's really a cool guy, if you're still in touch and if he'd come to his birthday party.
- Crazy stuff: In an effort to find out what gets you going, eventually he'll want to know the crazy things that you've done in the sack (or a baby pool full of KY). This will also galvanize him to ask if you'd do something he finds to be of risqué, kinky interest (hello threesome).
- People he knows: Sure it's childish, but a guy doesn't like to be blindsided with "yeah, dude, I hit that." The idea of hearing "Hell, Lumbergh f*cked her," from a third-party is ten times worse than knowing you slept with eleven guys during a particularly low self-esteem-y junior year in college.
- Money: Did money ever exchange hands? Not to be too-too judgmental but gold diggers are scary. Plus the hip-hop music has made us leery of trying to convert a ho into a housewife*.
Just like age is just a number, so is number of partners. What (and who) you did with that number counts. Oh, and just for the record, having sex with a virgin is not that exciting (unless you're in love or some such).
*Note: Mostly kidding on this one.
- YourTango
Find all your Fashion + Beauty + Health Products @ ForeverAlluring.com
0 comments:
Post a Comment